Love you

My soul calls your name in a whisper and a scream.
My soul calls your name when i'm awake and in my dreams.
My soul calls your name in a language only you can understand.
My soul calls your name a yin to my yang.

Designed as a pair our hearts must be,
like red and green they're simply complimentary.
Our story was written before this all began,
to read it and follow it was His divine plan.
To hold my hand through heartbreak and show you who you could be,
to caress me with your words and lips simultaneously.

Time and time after we do this dance.
On again, off again almost losing our chance,
to see that each is incomplete without the other,
a puzzle of sorts,
I question if we should bother.
My answer comes when I realize my heart's destiny was defined when I met you,
a fact of our lives that has always remained true.
A best friend and a lover intertwined,
I ask myself will we ever have enough time,
an eternity seems to short to share the sublime.

missing you tremendously,
and the way your kisses taste,
your touch, your warmth and your gentle embrace.

my soul calls your name when your here and when I'm alone,
my soul calls your name because our fate is foreknown,
my soul calls your name because you are mine and I am yours,
my soul calls your name even behind closed doors.

- by Cold

Raining Clouds Of Pain

Wandering this earth, all alone
Following the footsteps, on my own
Been left behind
Negative thoughts are, in my mind
I try to run, but I slip and fall
The earth around me, keeps moving
And I try, to move forward, but I can't
Because now

I am crying inside
And raining clouds stay strong, above my head
And I try, to runaway
But the rain keeps falling
So I keep running, never stopping
No one can stop me once I get started
I'll head off and never return
Start a new life and forget my past
And soon, the clouds will clear
And sunlight, will be, peeking through

- by Cold

The Ugliness After Love

The jokes have turned dull,
The laughter into cries,
The giggles of joy into screams of pain,
The patience of love into impatience of hatred
The kindness into sinful objectives
The smiles of happiness into the frowns of depression
The gentle kisses into harmful words of dishonesty
The joyful moments into painful memories
The amazing thoughts into harmful words
The inner-beauty into ugliness
The rhythmic taps of the keyboard into harmful beatings of the drum
The tasteful dreams into awful nightmares
The joys of happiness into the cries of depression
The hopes of more time with others into the needs of being alone
The friendliness into anger, the obsession into threats
The bravery and courage into shyness and uncertainty
The dances into fights, the ups into downs
The hugs and kisses into kicks and punches
The caring into hating
The 'I love you's into silence

- by Cold

Pain's never ending choice

All the while sitting and thinking
How how could I possibly do it
Without truly knowing how she felt.

Could I risk the thought
Of having my heart ripped from my chest
Again left out for all to see
Could I take the pain of another loss.

Too much grief has passed through
Only to come back to cripple me
At a time when I was believed to succeed.

Memories of the pain run rampant
In that part of my soul which has been
Sealed off from all others
Locked away and never to be shown again
Out of fear that which has scarred me so deep.

Locked away and left to dwell
On that which will never seem to happen
Trapped within the chaotic reaches of my mind.

Trying, trying to sort out where I went wrong
Seeming always to blame self heart and soul
For all the pain which has been brought about.

Sealed away and kept from anything
That might bring back the old pain
Or release a new one
Upon a heart that was left
Black and cold with a soul
Always remaining but never seen.

Mind, body, soul,
Heart and self, left to
Fend off the never ending demons
That came from long ago.

- by Cold

Where Are You ?

Here I stay all alone...
Time is slipping away...
No one but me at home.

Now here I am on this night...
I hate it when I end up this way...
No one around to hold me tight.

Sometimes the night just ends this way...
It's hard to see it coming at times...
So hope on its own crawls to the next day.

But tomorrow I might awake very sad...
Reaching out to really no one at all...
It almost seems as if I am going mad.

Where are you tonight my love?..
Could you be with another man?..
Why do I think so many things at once?..
Where in your heart do I stand?

When I go to bed and off goes the lights...
Out of the blue it always ends the same...
My mind and heart starts the same old fights.

You are like here today then gone tomorrow...
While in the process what you really do is...
You take away then put back the sorrow.

Is this the meaning of a love that is true...
It works for a while full time it seems...
Then part time on the nights I am without you!

So where are you tonight my dear love?..
Maybe having fun with another man?..
This night is getting so much colder...
I thought our love went hand and hand.

I really don't want to think wrong...
It's just my feeling of fear acting up...
Just wasn't seeing this coming all along.

I'm trying to survive long enough...
So when you return everything seems fine...
But every night it gets even more tough.

So here I wait and still I have to stay...
With no choice, reset, and no lives left...
The game of love I continue to play.

Just where are you tonight my love?..
What is the point to your plan?..
Are you trying to avoid my love?..
When the one you should be with is this man.

- by Cold

The Reality

Reality can sometimes be
A hard pill to swallow.
Not really wanting to see
How inside you feel so hollow.

When you first find love,
It's so great and close to perfect.
It's all you need and think of,
As two hearts join to connect.

It's as if a fairy, waving her wand,
Cast a spell all upon you.
So very magical and beyond,
Without a thing you can do.

How it grabs a hold of you,
Leaving you with no power.
Not having the slightest clue
How this "love" turned so sour.

All my hopes vanish into thin air,
Squashing me like a tiny bug.
The connection just wasn't there,
Like a cord without a plug.

But I continue to hang on,
Hoping we can get it all back.
Praying that it's not ALL gone,
Some way to get it on track.

I continue, sadly taking it all,
Because of all the time we spent.
Sticking in me like a voo-doo doll,
A thousand needles; I feel the torment.

I knew one day we'd see
Our regrets from the past,
How they came to be,
And will continue to last.

Though, I tried my hardest to fix,
Like words that remain unspoken.
Crashing down like a ton of bricks,
Remaining forever to be broken.

- by Cold

Immortal Reflections

The mirror stands alone
No reflection to be found
Emptiness binds cursed space
I stood there to face
Vanity still remain in my human phase

Reflection fathoms into its dark abyss
From my memories of past existence
Need to fill its visual memories
My face forgotten in its damned resistance

Too long ago the dark gift given
My soul remains divided
Between the mortality fixed
Its emptiness unseen in a mirrored being

I seek the artist of my era
To paint a portrait of my frame
To give back my existence within
To vision my face in their painted mirror

But a cruel critic as I was to be
Feeding into their artistry
Remains still a soul unsatisfied
Killing them slowly, twisting my mind

To excellence my beauty to be encased
Forever be my bane of vanity remain
A mortal flaw I soon realized
Made them my food for thought
Seeking many more to create

The one obsession I want to see
My face upon a mirrored painting
The canvas reflection of my features
Missing the detail of unplaced divinity

They gave me such arguments
The shadows brings deepen flaws
But light is needed to bring forth perfection
Only to my still dissatisfaction

That a pile of ashen dust will remain
If light should strike my face
Thus I do seek another opinion
Since they dies within my thirsting feel



As I look upon this many portraits
I wonder by many differences I see
In faces I can't seem to place
Within the dark side of my immortal face

Over the years spend seeking
A face of reflection unmade
Since long gone are the souls of the damn
Vanity is something I haven't given up yet

Life is too long an immortal beget
Without an image that I did forget
Upon the mirror that stands alone
Empty is the space I have since known

Are thing I not willing to let go
For the portraits fill the empty halls
My chamber echoes the ripples of flaws
A face of beautiful perfection
Seem to haunt me to depression

I stood as I always did
As I rise from a slumbering state
Darkness clouds the truth of my face
The vanity left from my mortal phase

Many died to paint my face
Over the years pass by, till centuries flee
For shallows graves marked not their mistakes
For my taste for the artist
Out weights their art in respect

I sleep far too long to wonder
That this renaissance era
Was a mistaken endeavor
Awaken I will in the next hour
A new century opens a new wonder

I stood before a new invention
Replaces the souls of conceited immortals
As I waited impatience upon my portrait
The picture reveals to my perfection
From canvas of paint to surreal magic
The true face reveals a prefect photograph

- by Cold